We who with songs beguile your pilgrimage / And swear that Beauty lives though lilies die, / We Poets of the proud old lineage / Who sing to find your hearts, we know not why ... (James Elroy Flecker)

17.3.19

Reminiscing in the Rain


Reminiscing in the Rain

The rain falls long today.
Waterfalls – lines of light –
drop from the sky: straight sheets.
A day to stay indoors 
as tears unstayed repeat.

The rain falls long today.
I hear the empty hours
fill with your footsteps – loud
and steady like the rain …
slow, as if with head bowed.

The rain falls long today.
I hear you come wetly
across the soaking grass
and the squelching footpath.
You pass, and pause, and pass.

The rain falls long today,
as that fell yesterday: 
hard, dark, across my heart
and footsteps walked away,
since when we played apart.


Responding simultaneously to Inform Poet – Monchielle at Poetic Bloomings and Weekend Mini-Challenge: Homographic Fun at 'imaginary garden with real toads'. (Homographs are words spelt the same, with different meanings. Mine are 'falls', 'long', 'stay', 'pass', and – cheating a bit – 'apart'. Also I was trying for a double meaning with 'fell'. And then there's the double entendre which some of you may detect.)

11 comments:

  1. Their is an understated melancholy in these lines, which really resonates with me, as I always love the despairing places in poetry. I have the sense of someone waiting for a beloved, knowing they cannot return, having already passed away. Very emotive and descriptive.

    ReplyDelete

  2. I love the image of waterfalls in the sky, Rosemary, the empty hours filing with footsteps and the vivid sounds in the lines:
    ‘I hear you come wetly
    across the soaking grass
    and the squelching footpath’.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is sheer poetic brilliance, Rosemary!❤️ Especially love; " The rain falls long today, as that fell yesterday: hard, dark, across my heart and footsteps walked away, since when we played apart."❤️

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, that first line refrain sets the mood for this melancholic and despairing song. I love, love the imagery and how it is so well in cadence with your words and repetitions.
    Love these bits in particular: "Waterfalls – lines of light –/drop from the sky", "and steady like the rain …/slow, as if with head bowed" and "You pass, and pause, and pass."

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes, i can hear the footsteps, feel the melancholy and the unstayed tears.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I can see the speaker standing by a window, half-drunk on nostalgia and longing... The repetition read like sighs or a picture (of something that happened long ago) getting clearer and clearer in her mind and heart until she can hear him coming as before.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh the melancholy in this... weather was just like this here also until it's almost sunset when the sky has turned blue....

    The though of long rain is exactly the way it may feel

    ReplyDelete
  8. I can feel the pain in this. There have been times I've stepped into a warm rain and let the tears fall. Mother Earth and I have a moment of letting go.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yes there is a strong yet subtle sadness that ebbs and flows like waves! It is utterly beautiful Rosemary!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Long goes a long ways doesn't it. Nice read, Rosemary.
    ..

    ReplyDelete
  11. and footsteps walked away,
    since when we played apart.

    There is that feeling of having missed lots of opportunities when one decides to stay away from a loved one!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete

DON'T PANIC IF YOUR COMMENTS DON'T POST IMMEDIATELY. They are awaiting moderation. Please allow for possible time difference; I am in Australia. ALSO, IF YOU ARE FORCED TO COMMENT ANONYMOUSLY – do add your name at the end, so I know it's you!