We who with songs beguile your pilgrimage / And swear that Beauty lives though lilies die, / We Poets of the proud old lineage / Who sing to find your hearts, we know not why ... (James Elroy Flecker)

2.1.24

Reluctance

 

It keeps going out of my mind: to light

a candle, with a prayer for the friend

who died yesterday. It doesn’t seem right

that he, younger than me, comes to this end

sooner. I want to forget, to pretend.


But he told me – soon after he knew – so

I can’t remove it from fact, can’t not know

he who was all grace and kindness has gone.

His hand clasped mine in goodbye, then let go.

Now I must bless and farewell, and move on.



Form: dizain






Sharing with Poets and Storytellers United at Friday Writings #108: Beginning. (Where I make the point that beginnings are entwined with endings.)


For the back story on this, if desired – a longish post, please be advised – see here.



28 comments:

  1. It must be so hard to lose smeone dear like that. You told what is wise to do and say. That has to be hard also. I was devastated by our first marriage ending in a surprise divorce . I, a man, cried and sobbed for a long time.
    ..
    Jim
    ..

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    Replies
    1. Men who are able to cry are very superior specimens, I reckon.

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    2. She just didn't know, did she? That's the truth, the first guy she married way too soon she shed before a year's time. Her fourth stuck so far. We married way too soon.
      p.s. I figured out how to sign in with google just a few minutes ago.
      ..
      ..

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    3. Oh good, gld you got the Google thing figured out.

      My first marriage (of three) lasted only three years –18 months before we separated.

      Delete
  2. So sorry to hear about your friend Thats not a good start. I send you a big hug xx

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  3. "he who was all grace and kindness"... he sounds wonderful... the candle will remind you about the lighting when the time is right, I think.

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    Replies
    1. He is being greatly mourned by many others whio saw him the same way.

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  4. Very sorry to hear of the loss of a good person gone too soon. A sad start to a New Year. Our vulnerabilities are in full display. We move on ... but not completely.

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  5. How terribly terribly sad . How blessed you are to have had such a lovely person in your life. My thoughts are with you...grief and loss are so hard to bear...Rall

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Rall. He was a blessing in the lives of many.

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  6. Sounds like a wonderful person. What a blessing for you to have known him, but gone too son.

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  7. It seems especially cruel when a younger loved one dies. We can only hope to be remembered as one with grace and kindness. I remember the first time I ever saw my father cry, after his mother died.

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  8. This kind of ending can take pieces of our hearts with them, can't they? But like your poem suggests, we must choose to let those empties be fill... and move forward. Blessings are a very start, I feel.

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  9. "... can't not know..." It would be so kind to ourselves if that were possible, to not know. I don't mean not to know a friend, but to be oblivious to what's to come. That's a selfish thought I think, though. I'm sorry for your loss. I wrote about an old loss, 19 years next month.

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  10. This is an excellent moving poem. It is so subtle, so delicate, but we can feel the grief. And yes, like the hand letting go, we must move on...

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  11. As I read, it was impossible to keep tears from falling, sobs from coming forth ... I lost someone that special recently ... your words were a perfect reflection of my emotion, words I did not seem able to think or to speak.

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    Replies
    1. Ah, my dear Helen, I hope that was a welcome release for you and not an exacerbation of pain!

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  12. So sorry, Rosemary. When your thoughts are gathered, you will light that candle, I'm sure.

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  13. So sorry to hear that someone so close left you. My condolences.

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