My first war, I travelled from newborn to six years old. Ration books and food shortages (yes, even in Australia) were a fact I never questioned. I lived among many more neighbouring women than men; in a house with my mother, my nana, my aunty, my girl cousin.
My dad would arrive like a whirlwind: briefly, large and loud. For two nights I’d be kicked out of sharing Mummy's bed, then he’d be gone again. (With a crippled leg from a childhood accident, he couldn’t go to the war with most of the absent men. He was in a camp in central Australia with others not-quite-fit, training to protect us here if our country ever got invaded.)
no war here –
but fathers who came back (if)
as strangers
During the Korean War I was in my mid-teens, surviving my parents’ divorce, uprooted from my childhood home, acquiring an abusive stepmother, moving to Melbourne and going to uni, starting to date. I barely noticed the war. (I learned a version of it later, watching M*A*S*H.)
MASH taught me
American army life –
not Korea
Our longest war lasted from when I was still single and childless to my sons being in primary school. I marched in protests, I wrote letters to newspapers and politicians. Our Prime Minister reintroduced conscription shortly before announcing that Australia would join its ally, the USA, in Vietnam. Our next Prime Minister declaimed, ‘All the way with LBJ’. At the motorcade when LBJ visited Sydney, anti-war protestors lay down in the road. The State Premier yelled, ‘Run over the bastards!’
A TV newsflash too sudden to turn off: the My Lai massacre. ‘It isn’t true!’ declared my shocked six-year-old. ‘Australians would never do that!’ I had to tell him, ‘I’m afraid they did.’
At a huge rally in Melbourne, a young man spat on the road, heckling the marchers: ‘My mate died over there!’
‘Then why are you not marching with us?’ an elderly man demanded.
Over 80
I no longer march.
There are still wars.

So much respect for those who protested war after war. Now the wars are livestreamed, we see all the blood and gore in real time....there will still be wars :(
ReplyDeleteIn some ways my worst moment of realisation and disillusionment was when Western countries were the invaders in search of those mythical 'weapons of mass destruction.' There were such huge and ongoing protests ahead of that one, all over the world, including the countries poised to invade. It was a massive collective cry, begging our leaders not to. They did anyway. They took no real notice of mass public outcry.
DeleteA sensitive take on the effects fireworks can have on those who experience/d trauma and a wonderful portrait of your growing self - Jae
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jae.
DeleteWe never learn.
ReplyDeleteSadly, it would appear so.
DeleteA part of your life..sensitively portrayed.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteSeems as if a nice, safe, public fireworks display would be a good way for humans to desensitize themselves from PTSD reactions, but it is a bit hard on dogs! Last time I watched a fireworks display, I was sitting on the hill about a city block above the parking lot where the fireworks were going off, and a dog streaked up the hill in a panic. It came to me, apparently for comfort. I said, "Where did you come from? Where are your humans? Are they down there?" Dog saw that I was pointing back toward the fireworks and bolted further uphill!
ReplyDeleteApparently they work as triggers, not de-sensitisers. Maybe some horrors are just not entirely recoverable from. And yes, it is hard on the poor animals too. I hope that fleeing dog eventually got back to home and safety.
DeleteOh the contradictions of mankind. War and weaponry are fireworks from hell instigated and allowed by humans who also love kitten videos. But the protests and marches must continue until someday they surprisingly actually do end.
ReplyDeleteYes. And yes.
DeleteNow Rosemary, you can still march way.over that, I'm doing the 90's fairly well, a little slower though.
ReplyDeleteI too would be slower these days, even with my walker. I find other ways to protest, such as signing petitions and emailing politicians. Does any of it work? Who knows for sure? Yet we must keep trying. It's certain that doing nothing will NOT be effective,.
DeleteYour poetry is the "perfect fit." Beautifully composed. Fascinating to read. As we are close to the same age, your memories mirror mine to a great extent. My Vietnam protest was one kept quiet, stuffed down .. way down. My husband and father of four spent one year in DaNang. July 67-July 68. He established the first laboratory at the Marine Base Hospital. As a physician and on his way to a career in surgical pathology, he performed dozens of autopsies ... our military killing each other over drugs and/or women. He testified at the court martial of each man. He was there during the TET Offensive living in a trench for days on end. It was a horrible time in all our lives.
ReplyDeleteOMG how ever did you all survive that? Ah, so many did ... and didn't. You must have great pride in your husband, though!
DeleteHelen ... that is an amazing story. I hope he recovered although it must leave wounds. War is such a hideous destructive thing. Thank you for sharing.
DeleteWars never gonna stop!! Hope 2026 is better!
ReplyDeleteI hope so too!
DeleteFirst, Thanks for the beautiful comment on my blog Rosemary.
ReplyDeleteAs I read through your poem it became my journey too.
The tragedy is wars will never end. Sigh.
Thank you too, Sumana, for this comment. Sadly, it does seem that wars will not stop happening.
DeleteMany years ago Buckminster Fuller famously said, "Either war is obsolete or men are" - the signs for everyone to see.
ReplyDeleteAlas! (One of the many wise teachers who were not sufficiently attended to.)
DeleteSadly we have always had wars since the beginning of time. Miracles will only stop it. We are making some progress. If mankind was left to its natural inclinations Humanity would be wiped out by now....Signed..calling a spade a spade
ReplyDeleteI can't argue with any of that!
DeleteMemories of wars can be unsettling, yet calming that you have learned & hoped & survived & coped!
ReplyDeleteYou are a fighter and a winner!
May you have a great 2026!
Many thanks!
DeleteWhat a well written, perfect poem of living through wars. Shame is, we never learn from the past.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteWell, maybe we learn a little bit. No nuclear wipe-outs so far. But that doesn't negate the suffering of so many via the weapons that are used.