In last night’s dream I could talk under water.
oh, that makes sense (I suddenly realise now) –
the one I was talking to was Bill, who spent
half his life underwater:
Bill the diver, to whom
I was married for 26 years. We were good mates
most of the time, and I loved his tales of the sights
and adventures below the surface. He would
have loved to take me diving too, but my
water phobia….
My other two husbands
(before and after Bill) loved ballroom dancing –
one was a champion, with cups and medals –
and I couldn’t dance at all, which must have been
a disappointment….
Bill and I were equally
hopeless at dancing and singing, so those things
we happily did together. Along with boating, and
travels around the country. Oh and of course, having
children, loving them, delighting in them.
I wonder
why we were chatting in my dream last night. Does
underwater, below the surface, signify deep in
the unconscious? Does he visit me often at some
other level of reality, only I don’t usually recall?
I know I was the love of his life, so it seems a bit
sad that he was only one of mine. But we both
always wanted more….
I think, of course, that at 83
I must be nearing my death. Maybe some part of my
soul has decided to go out with a cleaner slate, tidying
up loose ends, making sure of repairing any old hurts
with any old husbands? We were always good mates
(except for the break-up, but we moved past that) and
much in accord on many things….
Sharing this with Poets and Storytellers United at Friday Writings #83: The Finishing Touch, as it seems I might be putting the finishing touches to this relationship, or the memories of it, or my own coming to terms with it all.
Mother Nature is good with her dreams and all She makes us to feel better every we get a whiff of her healin breath.
ReplyDeleteRosemary, I've followed you through the years and how you've recovered so well. Not sure I will pull through with mine, we've been married fifty years.
I would like for you to come back and read mine again. I didn't want my poor cow to die, SHE butchered the puns that she tried to tell
Sorry.
BTW, I too am poor at dancing. I enjoy my lessons but still I forget all the next day. I remember the lessons but not the dancing. One of my teachers on a cruise was a very slight Russian girl. I almost fell in love with her.
..
I didn't get anywhere near as far as 50 years with any of my three husbands! Of course the inevitable parting will be very painful – but love always comes with the prospect of loss and grief, and is always worth it anyway.
DeleteSuch an interesting dream! The fluidity of being underwater where life's conversations float by can release a little of the emotional strings that bind and never unwind us from the past.
ReplyDeleteAn astute comment! Thank you.
DeleteHe was there to greet you, perhaps he had unresolved emotions, needed closure .. or simply missed you, needed to feel you. I am predicting many more years of Ms. Rosemary .. many.
ReplyDeleteAha, I hadn't thought of it as him initiating the contact, but of course I do know that can happen in what we think of as the dream state.
DeleteI sure hope you are right about the many more years! I think I need to take better care of the physical. The mind feels strong and lively, but if the shell wears out....
I think the Unconscious holds it all.
ReplyDeleteI find the idea of the sub-conscious trying to tidy up old wounds very powerful. Perhaps it means that we finally allow ourselves to accept and make peace with the past. The fact that the dream occurs underwater despite your water phobia probably is a sign.
ReplyDeleteYes, that last is an interesting point.
DeleteIs it because there is still some unfinished business to be done, some "tidying up loose ends", like you said? The Unconscious is a powerful thing, a strict teacher.
ReplyDeleteThis is what I get from your poem. :)
Yes, that's what I got too, from the dream.
DeleteHaven't we all had some dreams that made us wonder!
ReplyDeleteIndeed! The workings of the dreaming mind are very mysterious, and often much stranger than this.
DeletePondering the meaning of a dream can go on and on. But, wonder is a good thing.
ReplyDeleteI agree – on both points.
Delete