We who with songs beguile your pilgrimage / And swear that Beauty lives though lilies die, / We Poets of the proud old lineage / Who sing to find your hearts, we know not why ... (James Elroy Flecker)

8.8.25

Your Life Is Not Wasted If ...

 

[Not a poem; a reflection.]



Someone told me: ‘I feel I’ve wasted my life.’ I was shocked, because I don’t see her like that at all. So I thought about what would make a life wasted, and what would mean it wasn’t wasted. I don’t think it necessarily has anything to do with our achievements or our success in the world (although in my eyes my friend has plenty of both – but she doesn't always see it). Instead it seems clear to me that :


Your life is not wasted if:

 you have enjoyed its various pleasures

      e.g. tasty food, the beauties of nature, 

      singing and dancing, passionate sex …

you have given kindness to someone

you have smiled at someone

you have loved someone

you have cared for an animal

you have taught someone something useful

you have laughed 

you have been moved to tears

you have gasped in wonder

you have seen a rainbow

you have read books which you treasure 

you have had a friend.



A piece of prose this time, which I had occasion to write and feel is worth sharing. For Friday Writings #189: The Most Important Step, at Poets and Storytellers United, we are asked to write about what we think is the most important step a person can take. Although not written to the prompt, I think this answers it obliquely. Sometimes a simple realisation is a vitally important step!






16 comments:

  1. If I'm not reminding myself about all the things I've done then I sometimes feel this way too. It's usually a fleeting thought and could also mean that there is still opportunity to add more meaning to one's life with what is left.

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  2. Oh what a delight also to discover that I have done all these things They are indeed treasures

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    1. Having just read your own piece, I think you and I have similar ideas as to what's important.

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  3. Nothing is wasted. It simply is. Small is beautiful (I read a book with that title once).

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  4. l love your list. Whose measuring stick do some folks use when speaking of a wasted life? Often we think of the successes and possessions we never had, and the personal challenges we never took.

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  5. I guess that when we evaluate our life and find it lacking, we tend to look at all the things we DIDN'T do, or achieve, or get credit for, and ignore all the beautiful things that we DID do, and which your wonderful list enumerates, Rosemary. It's the same as yearning for what we want and don't have, rather than being grateful for all the things we have...

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    1. I guess it's human to do a bit of both at different times.

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  6. How wonderful - it is hard to pick the most important gift from your list - they all make for a life well spent when enjoying the seemingly little wonders - Jae

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  7. We are so conditioned to being " successful " we place our self value and the value of others by this criterion. Your poem lists the real things that count in a life. Agree.

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    1. Somehow, I'm not at all surprised that you do. (Smile.)

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  8. +



























    That list is so so right... the kindness and the caring and the loving and the teaching...and I wish I knew how to appreciate each of the items in it more and ignore the "and yet" screaming in my head!! Sigh.

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    1. [I'm sure you didn't intend that long space in your comment, but I am unable to remove it.]

      I wonder, what is the 'and yet'? I think it's OK to have ambition too, and a dispassionate assessment of one's progress so far. I just want to refute the idea that not having achieved all of one's goals yet equates to having wasted one's life. A wise teacher once told m, 'If you want to know how you show up in the world, don't ask the inside of your head; it will lie to you. Ask out there' – with a wide sweep of his arm to indicate the rest of the world. I thought my friend was listening much too hard to the inside of her own head.

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